What does it mean to be a man? Is masculinity purely biological or is it shaped by social and relational factors? Can a man’s relationship with a romantic partner have the power to legitimize or conceivably challenge his gender identity?
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Tag Archives: queer
Relational masculinities: The fragility of modern gender categories
29 JunReflections
17 Junby Kyle Ashby
With multiple sources reporting that Omar Mateen frequented Pulse nightclub and suffered from mental illness and internalized homophobia leading up to the shooting, I feel obligated to write a concise history of my queer life so you can understand two things: why I didn’t become Omar and why this shooting has affected me so greatly. Keep in mind so many circumstances and events contributed to me being alive and grieving today as an out queer man that the following can only be presented as a glimpse of the truth, a myopic description of self-determination. I present a monochromatic thread so that you can follow the unraveling edge to its black terminus: today, my third night of almost no sleep and emotional unease. I lay awake knowing that I hate Omar Mateen for the choices he made, for the pain he caused, for the lives he ruined, but learning that he may be part of my queer family means that compassion is redirecting my hate to the conglomerate of American culture that made both of our lives so different.
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Finding the ‘Dude’ in My Disability: How being both Queer and Crippled has Re-constructed my Maleness and Masculinity
20 Oct
Everybody thinks they know what it means to be a man. We all think we know that being a man means being strong, powerful and having an unforgiving sensuality that just won’t quit. We all know that being a man means you are the provider, the breadwinner, and you are self-reliant and sufficient, right? (I mean, c’mon, hasn’t every action/romantic comedy male lead been written this way for the past 50 years? Also, if I were to see a man like that in real-life, I would automatically fall to my knees. Do with that image what you like.) Imagine that, try as hard as you might, you were unable to meet the male milestones? How then would this shape who you are, and who everyone else thinks you should be?
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